Everyone knows Miami is going to be an exciting team to watch this year -- but most of the people who will be watching basically hate them (pretty much everyone but Heat fans). On a scale of 1-10, Cleveland residents, and some others, hate the new Miami roster at around an 11-12. Allow me to explain:
Welcome to the second annual Player Haters Ball. Let's get right down to it boys and girls.
The nominees are: LeBron James. LBJ is nominated for leaving Akron, Ohio, the town where he was born and raised by his mama and his mama's mama, where he played in the NBA for the Cavaliers, but told them too bad so sad Imma go to Miami so I can win that sweet, sweet ring.
hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate
Alright, alright. The next nominee is: Chris Bosh. Bosh is nominated for calling the cops on his drug-dealing neighbours, not because it was the right thing to do but just cause he was jealous of all the money they was makin'.
hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate
And the final nominee is: Dwayne Wade. D-Wade is nominated for bringing a bomb threat into Miami, for creating what some call a possible dynasty, and doing anything necessary to win a championship with no concern for the integrity of the game that is basketball.
hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate.
And the winner of playa-hata of the year is: Lebron James.
Lebron: Kiss my ass! Kiss my ass! Everywhere I've been, I've been the best playa. I love being a leader, and I love being the best.*
*actual LeBron quote.
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